Gold Coast for Dummies....

I got back from the Gold Coast last week, that place is amazing. I've never been to Australia, and it was so cool to hear all those freaky accents (kidding). Kept thinking I was in the cast of Neighbours. Gutted I didn't meet Karl or Susan Kennedy, my childhood heroes. I suppose Australia is quite a big place...


A quick run down of things I achieved in the Gold Coast (in no particular order)

Went to Dreamworld
Went on the best rides at Dreamworld
Went to White Water World
Went on the best slides at White Water World
Went fishing
Caught some fish
Went to wedding
Went fishing in wedding get-up
Caught fish in wedding get-up
Jumped off roof into pool at wedding
Saw a stingray
Saw kangaroos, dingos, lizards, pythons, alligators, crocodiles, and emus
Patted wallabies
Cooked a huge t-bone steak on the 'barbie'
Cooked massive prawns on the 'barbie'
Combined the two and had the best 'barbie' ever
Went to a surf club and ate a bucket of prawns
Bought a 'scooner' of beer (I didn't know what the barman meant, so I just asked for a big one)
Got drunk
Passed out on the couch
Got hungover
Lost 3 pairs of sunglasses
Bought 4th pair of sunglasses
Still have 4th pair of sunglasses
(It was an expensive holiday for sunglasses)
Played mini-golf (or 'Put Put' as the natives call it)
Didn't lose mini-golf (3rd out of 4 aint bad)
Drank alcoholic slush puppies (always been a dream of mine)
Went to the beach
Didn't get eaten by sharks
or snakes
or spiders
Went to Hooters
Spoke to the english girl who worked in Hooters
Wished I didn't speak to english girl because she ruined it for me
Found out english girl went scallop trawling for 3 months
Wondered who her careers advisor was
Bought 70 hooters chicken wings between four of us
Probably didn't even finish half of chicken wings
Ate oysters
Ate more oysters
Went to Pacific Fair
Found out 'Pacific Fair' means "Big SATAN'S ARSEHOLE Mall" in Australian
Went to Draculas cabaret restaurant
Enjoyed the show
Got suitably drunk
Got scared on the ghost train
Got the video of me with my hands over my face shown to the whole crowd at Draculas in the intermission
Rode in a limo with strangers
Went to a strip-club
Went on a flow-rider (at Dreamworld, not the strip-club)
Went on a mono-rail
Took photos on the mono-rail


Most importantly, I feel I made the most of it.


So there you have it, my Gold Coast holiday in a nut shell.

Being back at work sucks the big one, I'll tell you that for free.

I've signed a contract for www.suite101.com and am now writing articles for them, I've only done two so far though, so don't get excited...

Had a bloody good night out at the Monster Bar in Lyttelton the other night. Funky tunes and too much whiskey make ollie a bad boy...certainly paid for it the next day!

Soon.